My tips to not get whispers:
Ladies! EYEBROWS!!
They are to frame and brighten your face, not look as if they are looking to fertalize an egg. I'm not sure why when a lady goes after her brows what makes her decide to shape them into two unfortunate, lost sperms. My suggestion: part with that 20-30 bucks you were going to spend on two days worth of lattes and get a pro. Learn from them, they will shape those little whips of fuzz into things of beauty. They will follow your brow bone, they will be shaped, cleaned-up, combed and give you a eye lift.
You will look YOUNGER!! This also goes for the No. 2 Pencils, the Rooneys, the Earthworms, bald, backwards and constantly surprised. WHYYYY?
AAAAnd...
As you all know it's now sleeveless season so I just want to pass on a little reminder.
Underarm hair grows in at least 4 different directions (last time I read). Unless you are waxing you will have to shave in all directions to achieve a smooth, tidy underarm. Nothing fouls up the look a cute sleeveless shirt or dress than a 5 o'clock shadow all sticky with deodorant.
AAAAAAnd...
Over-tight clothing. Just admit you are a tad fluffier than you may have been last year and got into your revved up work out a little late so your clothes are snug. Not a problem stay on task with diet and excercise and Spanx it. I will be nice...or. Quit stuffing yourself into clothing that just doesn't fit. Wearing smaller clothing DOES NOT make you look smaller, IT MAKES YOU LOOK BIGGER. Nothing says living in the past like throwing on those waist bruising jeans with a t-shirt that doesn't want to cover the roll YOU'VE created. The number size is a guide from which to start. It is not an end all to wear a size that fits even if it is what you don't like. YOU WILL LOOK SMALLER! If you don't aspire to return to the size those clothes are, move on they are history. Again, I want to say IF you are on your way to losing those pounds consider Spanx...please. And, ladies who are a tad on the larger side please do not wear stretch pants...not to sound crass but we can see your ass. Dimples and all. If you are so inclined to partake in the skinny legwear trend Spanx it, or wear denim with a cute flow-y shirt with a giant romatic pussy bow or wavy flounces that will go over the buns. Just pleeeaze look in the mirror before you leave the house.
I love Spanx.
AAAAAAAAAnd...
People, people, people...I shake my head...Jammies, primarily bottoms, in public are okay for 3 year olds, tops. It is not cute, whimsical or funny. It is lazy. Thennnn, pairing said jammy bottoms with slippers, ugh, gross! I hope you're not going home and lounging in grime-y slippers as if you didn't just walk across a parking lot filled with spit, poo, gum, oil, dog pee, de-icer, unidentified spillled liquids...I could go on and digress... It is really not that hard to throw on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt with slides to run to the store. This also goes for the menfolk, some of you are guilty and you know it.
Next time I'm thinking: Hair Poufs, Where do you find high waisted, tapered jeans?, or something.
Because I care... *rainbow music and sparkles*
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